Have you considered that someone might be sexually attracted to you *and* consider you to be a more loyal, dependable, kinder, and a better long term partner than just some random guy with a six pack she has nothing in common with? Or some idiot who goes to the gym all day and has nothing to say to her? No. Because for you, it is deeply offensive for attraction not to be primarily sexual. That's what matters to you: fucking. You will always be 'cucked' in your head because she messed about before she met you. Even though you did the same.