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How to break up with someone you don’t hate (or just stop dating them)
Kindness is free, and it will save you a lot of time
Often, one person will break up with their partner while their partner still very in love with them. This is always sad, always feels horrible, and it’s very easy to understand why no one likes doing it. The opposite of love isn’t hate; it’s just apathy. Most of us feel more than apathy; we feel concern, compassion, and sadness for someone we used to care about a great deal. Often it’s just the case that you don’t see a future with them, rather than deeply disliking them. So here are my tips for a kind break up; although I fully expect backlash over my ‘no talking’ rule.
Break up with them as soon as you know you’re going to
The most crushing thing I’ve ever been told was that my boyfriend of three years had actually wanted to end our relationship for six months, but thought it would upset me too much and he’d feel bad doing it until he’d found someone else. That could have been six months of me also moving on, also being with someone who loved me, and not living a lie. It really should be the same week as your final decision, if not before. Never wait around for weeks and months on it: that person deserves to know so they can plan and make decisions on…
