Raise the bar ladies: yes, men really can do the washing without you asking

I’m tired of hearing men are too incompetent to keep a house

My boyfriend was staying with me this week, and I had to dash out after work to help make a last minute birthday cake. Oh God, I realised, as I ran through the sleet, I had to cook something for my baby sister when I got back. I’d completely forgotten. Frantically, I went through the fridge in my head for what I could cook. I still had to tidy the kitchen and vacuum too. I felt overwhelmed. I quickly sent my boyfriend a text.

So sorry running out of time and L will be starving- can you go to the cupboard nearest the wall and get out some pasta and just boil it? I’ll do everything else I promise. So sorry! Just follow the packet instructions call me if you need any help xx

I shoved my phone in my pocket and raced out into the dark. I’ll be honest: I had very low expectations. I’d lived with a boyfriend before.

He wants you to give up and stop asking

Maybe he was watching TV and wouldn’t see my message. Maybe he’d see and forget. Maybe he’d seen and would pretend he hadn’t. Maybe he would get too confused with where the pans were and how to turn on the stove and how long to cook it for. Maybe he’d call me four times and drive me insane with questions. Maybe I should just come back…