The negative media bias towards the Devil is disgusting and dishonest

Why is journalism refusing to give the overlord of evil a fair chance?

When was the last time you read a positive CNN article about the embodiment of absolute evil? Yeah, that’s what I thought. It’s time we took a stand against the liberal elite’s agenda

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A man’s got to eat, but I’ll bet that The Guardian will put a negative spin here

Get over it libtards, you didn’t win. Disease exists, mass murder exists, volcanoes happen and teenagers get spots, for all your plotting. The Devil is here on his 4.54 billionth term and he’s here to stay. For some reason, you insist on making out like all the things he puts forward for our planet are a bad thing.

He caused massive suffering for all eternity? Oh, let’s write a negative story on it. Woman forced into eternal servitude for you because she was desperate for her child to live? Wow, let’s make that look like a morally problematic action, why don’t we? The media control on the Lord of Evil’s work is staggering. They look for the smallest of his actions to criticise, and never have anything positive to say.

Can’t you write anything nice about a massive earthquake? The Devil has made his decision and it is up to you, as Americans, to back him on that and give him the support and faith he deserves. The only news source I can think of that gives the Devil his due -literally- is FOX News. And even they are swamped by accusations from other sources of behaving ‘immorally’ and promoting ‘disgustingly racist, sexist and backwards ideas’.

Wow. Do we live in a world where we have nothing nice to say about racist, sexist and backwards ideas anymore? When will this biased disdain for horrendous cruelty, fascism and stupidity end?

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Oh yeah, he forces people into eternal misery, that’s so bad, right CNN

Next you’ll be saying that cholera doesn’t have an upside. You snowflakes really are crazy. You refuse to look at the positives of an absolutely irredeemably bad figure because you can’t stand people disagreeing with you over soy milk or avocados. We have had enough. In fact, we voted for the Devil because of your kind of attitude: to give you a short sharp shock about reality. Ha, bet you feel stupid now, don’t you?

When I was a child in the 1950s, or was it the 1890s, we were able to find the upsides in life around us. Sure, we had to live in disgracefully cramped, disease ridden homes in the constant fear of nuclear war, and yes, black people couldn’t vote and husbands were allowed to rape their wives, but we found the positives! And now, we can look back with an aggravatingly rose tinted view of what is quite possibly one of the most appalling examples of a society to return to, and drive you up the wall insisting that we had ‘values’ back then (when we weren’t lynching black men for kissing white girls).

So I ask you, journalisminisimists: Why the constant negativity about the devil? You should at least give him 50/50 positive and negative air time. That’s just logical. And fair.


Written by

24 year old with an awful lot to say about everything. Opinions entirely my own. Usually.

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