Understanding Consent: why sex isn’t something you ‘do’ to a woman

Why it’s important not to paint women as sexually passive

I’ve signed a lot of consent forms in my time. Mostly for minor dental check ups, massages or physio appointments, I’ll admit, but I’ve noticed an interesting phenomenon in the rise of pen-to-paper requests for any kind of male and female interaction. At first, this made me laugh: I’d rather be caught dancing naked in Times Square than in a compromising fling, but it got me thinking. Is our conversation about consent damaging female sexual empowerment?

I completely understand the hetero-male paranoia on this (sorry if that appears insensitive, I’ll explain myself). They have been part of a cultural wave of propaganda and hysteria that paints it as incredibly likely that a scheming, maniacal sociopath will say you forced yourself on her. You aren’t: statistically speaking, you’re more likely to die of a stomach ulcer than to be prosecuted for sexual assault or rape. Rape also, as you no doubt know, has one of the…