Member-only story
Very begrudgingly, I’m coming out as demisexual (I know, yuck)
It sounds stupid, but we do need to talk about it
I was genuinely repulsed today when not one, but three separate men attempted to have a sexual conversation with me. Nothing abusive: just acknowledging their sexual feelings for me, or demonstrating interest in possible sexual activity. None of these men were unattractive, undesirable, or behaving inappropriately, but to use the most honest of language, my reaction was immediate and visceral.
Ew!
You know when you’re so turned off your body seems to shrivel like an apple core in the sun and you recoil as your mouth fills with acrid horror and disgust? That. That’s how I felt. Ew. Ew! I didn’t want them to think about me like that. I didn’t want to think about them like that. I felt annoyed, cheapened, vulnerable, weak, and sick with a nauseous repulsion. Which isn’t, this will surprise you ladies and gentlemen, something men want to hear when they’ve just attempted to flirt with you.
You could, of course, just call me a prude, or culturally English, and that’s probably at least 20% true. I’m definitely not asexual; I have been deeply in lust with the men and women I’ve been romantically involved with. As in, all day in bed with levels of lust.
