What you must think about before deciding to have children

Do you want kids, and if so, is that a good decision?

I’m not some freaky pro-natalist, or anti-natalist. I know women who are unbelievably happy at 68 and no children, and I know women who couldn’t be happier with a bumper crop of five. My best friend has a teenage son, and he’s great. But I do balk against the idea that children are the key to happiness, or that everyone should become a parent. So instead of just doing it because ‘it’s what people do’, I encourage you to think about some of these thinking points and make up your own mind. And yes: this goes for prospective fathers too.

A child is a huge responsibility: and a life changing one

Are you ready to be a parent?

No, not are you going to enjoy smugly posing in Instagram with a cuddly organic baby wearing organic linen. Not whether you can see yourself dancing Maria Von-Trapp style around the mountains with delighted children. Not even whether you are excited to play football with them or organise their Sweet Sixteen bash.

Are you happy not getting your nails and hair done, or going on holiday, for five years to cover the baby formula and diaper costs? Are you organised enough to book, track, attend, and remember dentist, doctor, teacher, midwife, and activity appointments for your kid? Are you going to be okay…